Seeker of the ancient beauty

 After the cleaning phase is (almost) over and I am now able to rest after the greenhouse, I am able to provide an answer towards this series of commentaries with Protesilaos (Metaphor and fact in religiosity), to whom I am thankful for taking the time to answer me in full seriousness, doing precisely what I've been asking God, priests and people of all kinds to do for almost half a decade now. I want to be honest first: I am not a philosopher; I cannot provide a system, I don't have things figured out and I cannot transfigurate thoughts into a corpus. I am a seeker; a seeker of meaning, of belonging, of Truth, of God, and I will be answer like one.

 I won't be answering case by case why did I state or why did their author do so regarding the affirmations used by you as an example, but I will address those as a whole.

While some of them are indeed examples to meditate about (i.e. tarot stuff as a form of foresight used even in christian environments alongsid bibliomancy or casting lots), others are quite literal, as the Elijah example, and the key here is that even when we are able to understand those events as a whole, the rule that you have stated is not true in every possible situation; for example, I can understand the act of giving birth, but you cannot plan it on command. I don't know if you get this example but I hope the gist of what I am trying to tell you arrives. 

Moreover, even if we were able to understand that it did rain fire from the sky, it doesn't mean that we can reproduce it, same as it happens with comets and falling stars. 

Going into the historic terrain, most of the ancient history is based on constructions over evidence. As for Helias, he did not burn children, but prophets of Baal, who performed human sacrifices.  

I don't think it's necessary to go beyond this point and address every example.

 About the rest of the entry, I only have to say that I am a living test-subject of it's cracks:

I've been doing the thing since I got crippled; went to mass, studied scripture, prayed, attended to rites, etc, and precisely, the night in june where I applied faith as you state it (as some sort of ing-soc tool to create a cohesive society) my entire mind fell off the ground, because for me, faith was about the sky not being empty, about the existence of Someone able to reach me at the lowest point of my life.

If we deplete faith from literality and just treat is as a conjunction of practices, the practitioners that faith itself need and the communities that we both yearn for, would banish in an instant, for no  one has ever accepted ruin for a mnemonic device, or do a fast, or help those in need, or lend his last five euros after being scammed about a hotel in Salamanca, or write hymns for a mountain that can't listen to them.

And even if you could say that I am not an average believer because I am quite heterodox, the rule you apply should also cover people like me, and, even with everything I've said taken into account I doubt you could tell me I am wearing an empty shirt.

What I was referring to, since the very first post, is that, for me, for someone who has followed your system, the moment the fire of faith dwindled for the reasons listed there, life felt less alive. The moment the sky didn't answer anymore, I felt like everything was coming down, for God, as we say in Spain, is the last resource everyone reaches for before giving up.

So, the question is, without the technical scaffolding, if there is something we can do about a sky that feels empty but maybe isn't, because we've forgotten how to be embraced by it.

I also do what I can; I am a member of a choir, I converted some people, I questioned the systematic answers from the priests that told me to offer up the suffering and the doctors that misdiagnosed me. I am fighting with everything I've got against the meaninglessness the modern world tries to impose onto us, without expecting a productivity increase, a calmer mind or a system that fits-all.

I am asking you, sincerely, if you could help me understand why I feel like I do not have anymore what it takes to find that dearest beauty, so ancient yet so new, that rests within us.